Fur Balls Part One

Here it is, after a small delay. I can't remember if I have watched any of these films before. I think I have but it is hard for me to say. I watched Critters (1986) last night and nothing about it, outside of the creatures, brought any memories back. I know I have seen these creatures before but I don't know if it is because of some other show that might have had a clip from one of the movies or if I have just watched one or some of one of the movies. I guess it doesn't really matter in the end. I didn't go out of my way to pick this series. I was just looking through Netflix movies one day and saw it so I added it to my queue. It is very possible I added these movies long before I started throwing reviews up here. I have been with Netflix for longer than I have had my blog and I don't think it has fallen below 200 movies in my queue since I first joined. What can I say? There are a lot of horror movies out there.

Critters starts off in space. There are a bunch of weird looking aliens and we discover that what we are seeing is basicly a jail. As it so happens, we arrive just in time to see a jail break. Some of the aliens escape but we don't get to see what they look like just yet. As they fly away in their space ship, one of the aliens in charge asks for the bounty hunters. From there we go to Earth, actually if you want to pin point it, Kansas. We meet the Brown family. There is Jay (Billy Green Bush) and Helen (Dee Wallace) and their son Brad (Scott Grimes) and their daughter April (Nadine Van der Velde). They seem to be a normal farming family. Brad and April fight like most brothers and sisters do. Jay will be going to a bowling tourney that night and wants his family to be there but April has other plans. She has brought home her boyfriend Steve (Billy Zane) home to meet her parents and they end up sneaking away to the barn to have a little fun of their own. Brad sees this and gets some of his home made firecrackers to scare them with. There is a problem for Brad though, he is in trouble for hitting his sister with his slingshot (even though he didn't do it, he took the rap for it) so he has to sneek out of the house. As he is doing this he spots a space ship flying over head and landing near by.

Father and son head out to find out what it was they saw. After some searching they find a dead cow that was attacked by something. Something that don't want to stick around to find out what it was. As all this is happening, the bounty hunters find their way to earth. At first they look like aliens really but they find people to copy in order to fit it. One of them picks a rock star while the other one keeps changing through the whole movie. Will the family be able to survive this alien attack?

Even though Critters as a series is rated PG13, I was a little surprised at how few the effects were. I think most of the effect money went into the Krites (what the aliens call the critters) which is fine since they are so important to the story. The gore effects are a little hard to find though. The cow was pretty gory but was just a cow and it was at night so wasn't the clearest thing in the world. As far as the attacks on us humans go, I felt they maybe should have shown a little more. These things are supposed to be very mean and they have a lot of teeth. One takes off one guys fingers in a single bite but for some odd reason, no blood. For what the effects are, they do a good job with them. I was just hoping for a little more I guess.

The acting is where Critters really shined for me. Dee Wallace was great as the mother. I also really enjoyed Scott Grimes as the son. For once the kid actors weren't very annoying. In fact, I believed the entire family. The behaved like one and I liked the brother and sister fights. This was one of Billy Zane's earlier movies, his third actually. He didn't have a big role but he was in the movie a good while. Actually there were a lot of people in this movie that I remembered from other movies. M. Emmet Walsh, Don Keith Opper, Ethan Phillips and Terrence Mann to name a few.

I was reading a lot of reviews that were comparing or out right saying that Critters is a copy or out right rip off of Grimlens. Maybe Critters was trying to cash in on this. I don't know but I don't see the two films as the same at all. The only thing I can see the same is these weird looking creatures attacking people. If there was one thing, outside of the effects, that I didn't like it was how many times Jay is attacked and lives every time. No one else gets so lucky. One attack and they are found dead later. Jay gets attack three times, if I remember right, and keeps on going. Sure he is hurt pretty bad but always seems to keep on living.

The Krites were fun though. They speak to each other and we get to see subtitles of what they are saying at times. I'm not sure what the modeled the Krites from but to me they are somewhat related to the porcupine. They have some needles they can shoot from their bodies that can cause us to go to sleep. You will find some comedy in this film. It just shows that they weren't taking the film to seriously but at the same time there probably are some jump moments for some people. One other thing I didn't really understand. As the Krites eat they get bigger. At least that was the impression they were trying to give. Only one of them ever gets bigger though and that was never explained. All in all, I enjoyed it Critters but it didn't really stand out to me outside of the acting. Still a fun movie though.
3 out of 5 Hope I have Jay's luck

Dying For Movies Part Eight

I lied to you all. I didn't mean to but I did. I said the next review would be the start of the new series I was going to watch next. Things changed, a little bit, when I went to Best Buy today. I went there to pick up a movie and walked out with two movies instead. While I was looking for the movie I went there to get, my eyes caught another movie. There before me was the eighth movie in the After Dark film festival. I didn't even know it was out yet but there it was in front of me, The Abandoned (2006). Since I have been waiting for this movie, I reviewed the other seven movies in April in case you are just tunning in, and because I was excited to have it, I decided to go ahead and watch it and put up a review. The start of every movie in this set has been the same, a little plug for the rest of the set and trailers, but this time it was different. This time they let us know that they will have 8 more films to die for this year as well! I'm hoping this time around it will be a wider release since I would have had to travel a great deal to see the movies last year, thus why I waited for the dvds. Time will tell. For now though, the last movie in last years set of eight.

The Abandoned starts off in Russia roughly 40 year ago. All we really find out from this short flash back is that a truck pulls up to a house, a scream is heard and when the people in the house investigate they find a woman inside dead with two babies next to her who are very much alive. In the present day we meet Marie Jones (Anastasia Hille). We discover, over the course of the movie, that she has been looking for her parents. I sorta got that she herself is lost and is looking for something besides her parents. She has at least one child back home who we hear at the start and end of the film giving a little voice over. A lawyer in Russia has discovered who her parents are and she has to travel there in order to find out plus wrap up inheritance. From this she finds out that her parents are dead and she now owns a house that has been sitting empty for almost 41 years. She decides to go see the house and that is when things really start to get weird and she also discovers she has a twin brother. I would tell you more of the plot but this is a hard movie to talk about as it would give to much away if I went to far.

You won't find a lot of effects here but when they do show something it is done very well. The brother gets shot in the leg and then goes digging for the bullet with a knife. That ends up looking pretty gory as well as when some pigs start munching on someone. They could have gotten more graphic than they did with that but what they did show was very well done. The acting in was also very strong. The Abandoned actually has a very small cast so they had to find some good lead actors and that they did. Anastasia Hille and Karel Roden (who plays the brother) both give strong performances. You will also find Valentin Ganev, Paraskeva Djukelova, Carlos Reig-Plaza and Marta Yaneva.

I realize I skimed over the effects and acting some. I did skim over the acting because I wanted to talk more about the characters more than the acting. Some people seem to have a problem with Marie. Saying things like she was being stupid and some even saying they should have gotten another actress because Anastasia isn't the best looking woman out there. From my point of view, I thought the characters behaved in a very real fashion considering what they were going through. At times it was a little easy to guess what they were going to do but at the same time, the writers did a good job of mixing things up and keep the build of tension going.

I started to read some of the reviews on Netflix before I watched the movie and only got through two after reading there is a twist ending. I was afraid someone might give it away so I stoped and watched the movie. I don't feel there is a twist ending. Maybe it was because I got something different from The Abandoned than they did. This is a movie that does get a little confusing at times so I think repeated viewings will help with that once you figure out what was going on. The pacing is a little slow, almost through the entire movie but I felt it had to be because it requires you to think about what is going on and figure some things out on your own. A fast pace movie doesn't always give you time to think about everything that is going on. That was a problem for some people of course.

The only problem I really had is that sometimes it was rather easy for me to figure out what was going to happen at certain times. Marie catches a glimpse of someone behind her and I knew right away who it was going to be and I was right. This won't happen for everyone though since the more movies you watch, the easier it gets to guess what the twists will be. I can easily see why this became the fan favorite out of the eight movies. While it won't get my top grade like one of the other movies did, it is still one of the best out of the eight. They do a good job of establishing the tension almost right from the start and they keep it going, despite the slow pace, throughout the entire movie. If anyone of you has watched this one, I would like to hear your take on what the movie is about. If you haven't watched it, I think you should. Now, the next movie will be the start of a new series. I swear!
4 out of 5 Hoping the next series is as good as this set was

Going Batty

After a short break, I'm back! Not a whole lot going on today so I thought it was time for a movie. I was going to watch one last night but there is just to much on tv that I like to watch on Monday nights. With the new season of Hell's Kitchen kicking into full gear, I'm ready for it! I know its not the best show around but it is better than watching repeats and the head chef on that show cracks me up. This is the third season for the show now. I didn't start to watch it until last year though. Anyways, I didn't mean to plug the show or anything. Just was looking for something to fill up some space. It's hard work coming up with things to talk about here! After 200 posts, you start to run out of things to talk about you know. Today's movie review is a movie I have watched here and there. Everytime I came across it on tv somewhere it had already started so I had never watched it from start to finish until today. Bats (1999) was a movie I knew wasn't great but seemed fun all the same so I'm glad to have finaly watched it completely. Did my feelings change?

Bats is about, you guessed it, bats. We meet Dr. Sheila Casper (Dina Meyer) who's job is to study bats. She is supposed to be the most respected in her field so when a problem breaks out in a small town in Texas, she is called in to help. The problem is that Dr. Alexander McCabe (Bob Gunton) has been experimenting with some of the largest bats around and has made a virus that can make bats more aggressive and maybe more importantly, smarter. So a couple of bats excape a lab, no big deal right? That is what they think until they discover that the virus can spread to other bats. They don't go into the how of this which I would have liked to know but not really important. Sheriff Emmett Kimsey (Lou Diamond Phillips) is helping out as well and is dead set against losing his town when the goverment decides to deal with it the only way they know how, try and bomb the bats in their caves. Sheila comes up with a different plan but can they get everything ready before the jets come in and bomb everything?

The effects in Bats aren't really what you would find in most horror movies. When the bats attack, we usually see close ups of the attack, probably so we can't tell the bat(s) attacking aren't actually real. The camera can also be very shacky and the shots move around a lot so you can't always tell what exactly is going on. The bats themselves are a combination of CGI effects and puppets. There is a short making of feature on the dvd and I was under the impression from it that no real bats were ever used. The gore effects are limited. There is some blood squirting at times but the real gore scenes are shown fairly early when we see just what kind of damage these bats can do to a person. The doctors are examining one of the bodies found with the mid-section ripped open. The only problem with this I had was that there is this big gaping hole and everything inside looks intact and in perfectly in place.

The acting was pretty good. I didn't really have a problem with anyone's acting in Bats at all. Dina Meyer does a nice job as the lead character. Lou Diamond Phillips and Leon are the two supporting characters with Leon providing the funny remarks. This isn't a comedy though. Leon does provide the comedy but only because of what he says, when he says it and how he says it. You will also find Carlos Jacott, Marcia Dangerfield and Oscar Rowland.

I found Bats entertaining enough that I enjoyed it but it does have its share of problems. These problems are more with the script and plot more than anything else. From reading other reviews, I get the feeling that other people feel the same way. Not all people will say why they disliked or did like a movie though. Some are picking on the movie a little harder than was needed as well. One person hated the fact that the say the title of the movie so many times durring the movie. While I'm sure there are plently of other words to call bats, why not just call them bats since that is all they are after all? Another person didn't like it when the doctor who made the virus said he did it because that is what scientists do. I guess he missed the part when they later said they were being designed to be a new biological weapon.

What I didn't like was mainly the ending of the movie. Sheila and Emmett have figured out that the bats are not in a cave somewhere but inside an old mine. They go in to try and do their plan and once they have set their plan in motion, get out before the mine is sealed. Don't worry, I'm not spoiling anything here. The problem I had is when they are running to get out of the mine, they keep delaying. Emmett turns around a couple of times to fire his gun at the bats that are hot on their trail. I didn't understand why they kept doing stupid things like that when they knew they had to get out before the bats caught up with them or got ahead of them. It was one of those yelling at the screen moments for me.

Bats is one of those movies that you know going in that it probably won't be a scary movie. If you do happen to watch it, if you haven't already, just sit back and let it entertain you. They don't take to movie completely serious and neither should you. It isn't a flat out comedy, nor do they try and make it one. The actors do deliver serious enough performances to make it believably but, at the same time, give enough comedy to make it fun as well. Fix up a lot of popcorn, sit back and enjoy! Next up, the next series review. Want to know which series? Come back and find out!
3 out of 5 Call them flying creatures damn it!

Murder On The Set

After watching today's movie, I was throwing the idea around of making it a tribute post but I think I will hold off on that for the time being. Main reason I was throwing the idea around is because Priscilla Barnes is in The Backlot Murders (2002). This made me realize she has been in her share of horor movie. She isn't really the one doing the screaming most of the time but it's still cool that she is in so many horror films. Perhaps I will do a tribute here soon. I just haven't decided with who yet. Not a whole lot going on in the universe that is mine...ours, I meant to say ours. I will be competing soon in swimming so if you want to wish me luck, feel free. I can use all the luck I can get! Anyways, here is the review that I am very behind on writing.

The Backlot Murders are set in the Universal movie lots. You will know this by seeing all kinds of movie, and sometimes, tv sets. As you can see from the poster for the movie, the Psycho house. I don't think they ever say its the Universal backlot. They usually just call it the backlot. The people we meet are there to shoot a rock video on the Lost World set. One of the few sets they actually name. The lead singer of the group, Dez (Brian Gaskill), is dating Janey (Jamie Anstead) who happens to be the daughter of a big shot at a record company. He is basicly helping out this group on his daughters say so. She thinks the have talent and daddy is helping out. Some of the crew includes the producer, Stephanie (Priscilla Barnes), and the director, Henry (Charles Fleischer). It doesn't take long before we someone wearing a mask (supposed to be of someone famous but I didnt know who it was) going around killing the crew and band members. Who could it be though?

The effects are pretty good this time around. A lot of what could be very bloody deaths are shown off camera. There are some that are shown on camera but those are your strangled type deaths. There is one effect that was shown though and it turned out to be a very good one. One person is tied down and talked to for a bit before getting his throat cut open. Then the killer reaches in and pulls the guy's tongue out from below the jaw. I don't know why the killer did that but it was pretty neat all the same and not something I remember seeing down in another movie before.

The acting wasn't to bad either. Priscilla Barnes and Charles Fleischer are the veteran actors in this movie which could be why they get the most on screen time. I liked Priscilla in this one. She is a bit of a bitchy character but it was fun seeing her playing the part and doing it well. She even added a bit of blue to her hair to fit in better I guess. Charles was basicly the comic relief. His character yells at the band a lot and he has his little dog with him almost all the time. Corey Haim has a small part as one of the group members. You will also find Carrie Stevens, Tom Hallick, Lisa Brucker, Dayton Knoll, LoriDawn Messuri and Heather Tindell.

I felt the pace of The Backlot Murders is just fine. The murders start fairly early and happen at a fairly regular pace through the rest of the movie. Really the problem is with the plot. The reason behind the murders is somewhat explained. I didn't really have a problem with that though. The problem is that they don't do a very good job of keeping the secret of who is doing the murders. In fact, they bring up the person so much through the movie that it isn't a surprise at all when it is shown. There is a twist thought that I won't spoil. There are actually two people doing the killing but I think it is just person up until they show Bobby (the person they talk about every 15 minutes or so) talking to someone else.

Another problem, for me anyways, was that they mixed comedy in with the horror and it didn't work very well because they were trying a little to hard to make it funny instead of just letting it happen. One of the women will run up to someone, say something silly with some silly sounding music being played at the same time. Trying to give the impression that she is a bit of an air head I think but because of the music, more that the actress, it easily takes you out of the build up that was happening up until then. This is mainly why I wish the writers would make one type of movie or the other. I can enjoy a laugh now and then during a horror movie in the right places. It isn't meant to take me out of the mood, like it does in The Backlot Murders, but it is supposed to lower my guard some so the next horror moment has more impact.

I thought maybe The Backlot Murders was going to turn out alright but it didn't. The group, and most of the crew working with the group, aren't very likeable. It could have been a pretty good slasher flick but the comedy part of the movie takes us out of that part. Some of the women in the movie are hired for the music video to dance in the background and dance with the guys some. Eventually most of them are shown topless so there is plenty of nudity for those of you that like that in your horror movies. Over all, The Backlot Murders disappointed me. It was a real bad movie but I wish they hadn't tried so hard with the comedy part of it. Not the worst out there but it could have been so much better.
2 out of 5 Who was that a mask of?

Slice & Dice Part Two

I wasn't planing on seeing Hostel: Part Two on the big screen but when one of my oldest friends invited me to go see it, I just couldn't refuse. I could have I guess, I just didn't have a good reason not to. I did go see the original on the big screen so why not see the sequel? The fact that it hasn't been getting good reviews and even one newspaper is saying that since Hostel: Part Two floped, that is the final nail in the coffin for horror movies. If you agree or disagree with this, you should go to Crwm's blog and leave a comment on his post about this. I will admit that when I heard about Hostel: Part Two, I was disappointed. I just didn't think that Hostel needed a sequel. Even after seeing it, I still feel it wasn't needed. It does expand on some things but in truth, I didn't need to know any of it. So why did I go see it then? For the above reason and I also knew I would see it eventually. I do love my horror movies after all.

Hostel: Part Two, to my surprise, picks up not to long after the first one leaves off. We catch up to the loan surviver of Hostel and discover what his final fate is. This was very nice and something I wish more movies would do. To often are we left to wonder what happened to people from the previous movie. From there we meet Beth (Lauren German), her wild friend Whitney (Bijou Phillips) and the a little to down to earth friend Lorna (Heather Matarazzo). They are taking an art class in Rome. After the class they meet Axelle (Vera Jordanova) who was modeling for the art class. After the class they catch a train and have some trouble with a group of guys on the train. Eventually they run into Axelle again and she invites them to a place that has some great hot springs and they except the inventation. Once they arrive there we see that this is the same hostel that the guys from the first movie visited. We then see the host take their passports and send their pictures out to people that are in this club that end up killing people for money. We discover that they bid on the people that are waiting and once they win, they fly in to do the dirty work.

The effects in Hostel: Part Two are not as gory, in my opinion, as they were in the original. There are times they do get gory but overall I just felt the original was worse with the gore factor. One thing I found interesting is one of the people that won one of the three girls was a woman as well. She has an interesting way of getting a blood bath. One guy has part of one leg missing and the skin missing off the other leg while the guy doing cutting is cutting small parts off his leg and eating it. One of the girls gets part of her face cut open and hair pulled out. We also catch a glimpse here and there of other things happening. Death by dogs was a nice touch as well. One last effects is probably the best of them all and is a nice way to end things. Since this movie had a good budget behind it, all effects looked great.

The acting was pretty good as well. Jordan Ladd, who I think has managed to be in almost everything directed by Eli Roth, as a small part. The three leads are good with Lauren German probably being the best of the three. Roger Bart has a fairly big role in this movie and has a nice role reversal with his buddy Richard Burgi. Some interesting triva about Bijou Phillips is that she is the half sister to Chynna Phillips (most know for her group Wilson Phillips) and also half sister to Mackenzie Phillips (One Day At A Time among other things). So she does have acting in her blood.

Maybe because I went into Hostel: Part Two with only a half heart and not really interested in it, it effected how I judged it. We delve into the club behind this a little bit more than it did in the original. I don't think it really mattered to me how it worked and thought these scenes were simply ok. The set up was easier to see, who all was involved with only a few surprises with who was and wasn't involved. This one does seem to have a following which I'm guessing comes from the hard core horror fan base since the movie failed to make money. It felt like a rehash of the original but with new people. I guess one can say that about a lot of movies and their sequels though. The only way to make a good sequel, usually anyways, is to try and expand on the movies that came before it. The problem with trying to do that with Hostel: Part Two is that the only way they could expand, and tried to expand, was on the bad guys. In horror movies though, generaly the more you know about the bad guy, the less interesting they become.

I didn't really have any complaints outside of it felt more of the same but with less gore. My friend hated the Lorna character though. They made her so nice and shy that it was becoming very annoying. In fact, my friend who I have never really heard her say anything bad about anyone, said "God, I hope someone kills her off soon. Now would be even better." Some reviewers disagree with me on this but I rather enjoyed the ending and I think it helped save the movie some with the last minute twists. One of the last effects in the movie has been done before but I don't think it has been done so graphicly before. It was also nice to see a woman using her smarts to get out of a situation instead of dumb luck. If you liked the original movie then I'm sure you will like this one as well. Maybe you will like it better and maybe you won't like it as much. I wouldn't get in a big hurry to see it unless you are a hard core horror movie person. I thought Hostel: Part Two was simply ok. The ending helps but not that much to rush out and see it. I liked it but not overly so. I'm sure I will see it again at some point since it did have its interesting places.
3 out of 5 Fun watching the wild kids kick around a severed head...well, it was!

Going To The Lake

I think I made it out of the very low budget movies at last. Not that it is a bad thing but this last string of movies, over the last month or so, hasn't been to kind to me. Today's movie, Fever Lake (1996) wasn't what I would call a large budget movie but it was easy to tell that it had more money than some of the other movies I have been watching. Clear picture and actors I have actually heard of but not what one would call big names all the same. After watching it, I went on to read some other reviews just to get an idea of what other people thought of it. This is something I usually do just to see where I stand compared to other fans and once in a while this gives me something to write about here as well. I was a little suprised at how much people hated this movie. I will be the first to admit it won't be making my favorites list any time soon but all in all, it wasn't half bad.

Fever Lake starts the way same as a lot of slasher movies. It starts with a murder. We see a mother hiding her child in the attic and then she runs into a bedroom to bar the door. Dear old dad starts walking up the stairs with an axe in hand and manages to get to mom and chops her up. We are told later that dad kills himself as well but the son survived. Years later, at least it is safe to assume it is years later, we come across Albert (Corey Haim). He is gather up some friends and they are going to spend the weekend up at Fever Lake in order to get away for a while. He has a house there but never explains why it is house. His friends are Steve (Mario Lopez), Bobby (Randy Josselyn), Sarah (Lauren Parker), Danielle (Mary-Rachel Foot) and Christy (Mattie Semradek). They take off from their college, which isn't to far away, and start to make the trip to the lake.

As they are doing this we meet Sheriff Harris (Bo Hopkins) who is talking Clear Springs (Michael Wise). Clear Springs is the local indian who is going around warning everyone that evil is coming. He is talking about an old indian legend that an evil spirit lives in the lake and makes itself known every so often. It won't go back into the lake until its hunger has been taken care of. Albert and his friends stop off at a little diner by the lake. No one talks to them except for Lila (Lindsey Brooke), their waitress, but they sure will stare at them. Before Lila heads home, she gives them a little warning about the evil in lake. Will they listen though? Of course not, they are just interested in having some fun. So, the question now becomes who will the evil spirit take over and who will survive?

The effects disappointed me some. Being a slasher movie, basically, I was hoping to see some good death scenes. Instead, most of the murders happen off screen. The most bizarre murder was when one couple was making out, one laying on top of the other, when they are killed. Doesn't sound to bizarre does it? What made it bizarre is that the killer appears to only swing the axe twice at the top person and yet manages to kill them both. Sometimes you will catch a glimpse of the aftermath of a killing. The biggest effect comes at the end when one person seems to age and the melt in front of the crazed killer.

The biggest complaint I could find about this movie was the acting. I guess the people that complained about it need to watch some of the movies I have over the last month to understand what bad acting truely is. I though Corey Haim did a nice job in Fever Lake. I have never been a big fan of his but have seen a lot of the comedies he was in over the years. As for Mario Lopez, ok I will admit it, I used to watch him on the tv show Saved By The Bell. There, it's out, you can make fun of me now. He didn't have very many lines over all in this one but wasn't to bad with what he did have. The biggest surprise for me was Lindsey Brooke. From what I have figured out about Fever Lake, it was filmed in and around Kenosha, Wisconsin. This also happens to be where Lindsey grew up. So, I am assuming that she was a local that managed to get cast in an actual role for the movie. She has been in a few other movies which I hope to be able to watch sometime. Lindsey had a minor role in the movie really, we get most of the information about the lake either from her or through her but I just felt she did a great job.

Fever Lake isn't the best horror film out there. Some feel it should be listed as one of the worst movies but I have to disagree. Maybe if I had watched this movie before all those other bad movies I would have thought so as well, then again, maybe not. It does have a fairly slow pace to it. There is the murder at the start then we don't get another one until after the hour mark is passed. Personally, this didn't bother me much at all as I found the set up period entertaining even if it was a little long. The plot did get confusing by the end of the movie because it is hard to tell where they were going with everything by then.

Another area I didn't like was the way the characters would act at times. One of the women is in a truck ready to leave when the passenger door opens. We don't see who it is but she screams and exits the truck. Instead of running away from the truck, she runs to the other side of it (because the house happens to be on that side). Whoever she was running from seems to have disappered but still, why would you run towards the person that you are running away from. I guess she was trying to catch the person off guard like she did with me. What makes this worse is that she had tried all the doors to the house just minutes before and finds them all locked. I can understand that while in a panic she may forget this but it seemed silly to me. Even with the flaws, I enjoyed Fever Lake. I didn't feel it was great but I have spent time watching much worse than this one. If you decide to give this movie a try, I wouldn't rush out to try and track it down but I think most people would find it enjoyable all the same.
3 out of 5 Another reason not to swim in lakes

Held Captive

Once in a while I come across a film that I'm not real sure how I should feel about it. This is usally because of the subject matter but it can also include how well it was acted or how well the effects were done. Starved (2000) was one of those films for me. This time around it had to do with the subject matter for the film more than anything. To me, it boarders on thriller and horror. As another reviewer noted, Starved will probably be more disturbing to women than it will be to men in general. Not saying men are cold hearted but I just can't picture a man in the same type of situation. Do I have your attention yet? If I do then that is what I was hoping for.

Starved is basicly about three people. We first meet Monica Andrews (Lee Anne Beaman). We discover that she works in an office and has a few friends there including her best friend Jane (Toni Zobel). Monica meets Scott (Hal Adams) at a bar one night and is a bit put off by him because he is video taping his conversation with her. She finaly gets him to turn the camera off and seems to loosen up once she thinks it is off and proceeds to answer the personal questions that Scott asks. She feels he is a nice guy even though he was being a bit creepy with the video camera and the date for the next two weeks. Scott invites Monica to a home cooked meal and even sends her a bunch of roses as a reminder. Monica doesn't tell her coworkers a whole lot about Scott, they don't even know his name. This only adds to the problem when Monica suddenly disappears. No one seems to know what happened to her and the police, under maned and 100s of missing persons cases, are not being much help so Jane tries taking matters into he own hands to find out what happened to Monica.

We already know what is going on with Monica. She was druged and wakes up in Scott's basement. At first she is free to move around but soon enough she wakes up with shackles around her ankles. What follows is Scott trying to break Monica down. He only gives her bread and water to eat at first. Once her gums start to bleed, he starts to give her vitamine pills. He starts to try and convince her that she is not Monica at all, Monica is dead and all her friends don't know who she is. As he gets her to admit she is no longer Monica, he tries to get her to think that she is his sister Sarah and that his name isn't Scott at all. Will Scott manage to make Monica into Sarah or will Monica fight back and be saved by Jane in time?

Since there is no real violence in Starved, there are little effects to be found. Scott isn't beating Monica or keeping her as a sex slave, he is trying to brain wash her. Sure he gets mad and throws his temper around but he never hits Monica or anything like that. They did do a wonderful job of showing Monica getting weaker and almost ageing as she is deprived of real food. The only other effect is when Scott gets so frustrated and mad that he cuts open his own hand. Made me squirm a bit watching him stitch it back up himself. The acting was also very well done. According to IMDb, this was the last movie that Lee Anne Beaman was in which is a shame. I don't know how she did in her other movies (one reviewer said she had small parts and was usually nude) but she did do a wonderful job in this movie.

As I said, I'm not sure about this movie. I liked it but I can't really decide if I should call it a horror movie or not. Sometimes a horror movie will leave me disturbed instead of scared in places but this whole movie was that way. I never felt scared by what was happening to Monica, I only felt an unease and disturbed by it. Should a movie that envokes those feelings be called a horror movie? I don't really know but it does have that label and I did watch the movie so here is the review for it here. I never really thought of these types of movies as horror movies but then again, I don't know how to label them.

The only problem I really see about Starved is that it comes close to being very boring. In truth, not a whole lot happens. No real action at any point in the movie. Some say you need something exciting happen in a movie in order to keep people from falling asleep. If you are one of those people then you might as well skip this movie. Still, even for me, one who doesn't need action to keep me interested (although it never hurts), I was getting close to being bored at times. Because of that I wasn't real sure how I should rate it. Not very many people rate this one very high. Netflix averages just above 2 stars and IMDb averages just above 3 stars so, for the most part, it isn't reguarded to highly. If this sounds like a movie you might like then I would suggest trying to find it. I do know Netflix carries it since that is where I got it from. One other small thing, at the start of the movie it claims what we will see was based on true events. At the end of the movie, durring the small print, it says that the story and people are fiction but the event really happened. So I assume they came across news account of something like this happening and made a story around that.
3 out of 5 Think I will find something to eat now

Funny Thing Happened At The Graveyard

Ah Stephanie. What am I going to do to you girl? I managed to watch another movie that Stephanie Beaton had her hands through completely again. She has a smaller part this time around but once again is director and producer. She adds to her resume by also doing the cinematography and special effects. I'm sure it is saving some money on the budget, hopefully anyways, but doesn't she know that by doing everything herself doesn't mean it will turn out better? Tales From The Grave (2003) will remind you of Tales From The Crypt in just about every way possible. Out host in an old hag that you can just barely make out at times. I thought it would be cooler if they just had someone roaming the graves and picking one to tell a tale about. I mean, they did name it Tales From The Grave so that makes sense to me but maybe it is just a little to simple. They offer up four stories in just under 2 hours time so lets see what these stories are all about.

The first story is called Crazy Gunderman. It is about this local crazy guy that lives out in the woods and the whole town is afraid of him. Every weird death that has happened in the town over the years has been blamed on Gunderman (David Hernandez). It is said is a warlock of sorts. He knows how to curse people and takes pleasure in doing so. Three friends are playing basketball when they see Gunderman walking down the middle of the street. One of the guys yells at Gunderman to get out of the middle of the street (didn't look like a street to me, more like the other side of the court) and Gunderman just stands there staring at them. When he starts to walk away finaly, one of the friends throws the basketball at him and hits him in the back of the head. He gets up and starts to chant and the guy that threw the basketball suddenly can't breath. After that is over, Todd (Tony Olivas) goes to his friend Mike (Matt Schwarz) and tells him what happened. Mike comes up with the idea of paying Gunderman a visit and scaring him back. They come up with a plan, go to where Gunderman lives and they do manage to scare him, to death actually. They run off but end up back at the same place and they can hear Gunderman laughing. Maybe they didn't kill him afterall. Soon they discover that they can hear his laughter any where in the woods and no matter which direction the run, they always end up back at Gunderman's place. Will they be able to escape or will Gunderman have the last laugh?

The second story is called The Wrath Of Hercaylac. The crypt keeper....opps, I mean the witch, tells us about this witch who is called Hercaylac that lives in the woods who is said to be undead. Instead of this though we come across a writer who is coming to the woods in order to get away from the stress of the city. Vinnie (Joe Estevez) isn't cut out for country living though as he struggels to find something to do to keep from being bored. He discovers a jack-in-the-box and we get a voice over saying for as long as he can remember he has never liked the things. He pushs jack back into his box and sets it back down. Later he picks it back up and starts to turn the crank. If he doesn't like the thing I don't know why he is playing with it. Anyways, he turns the crank for a while and nothing happens so he opens it and discovers that jack is gone! Vinnie does what anyone would do in this case, he goes and gets a shotgun and starts shooting at any little noise. This odd story does manage to involve the undead witch towards the end.

The third story is called Lab Rats. Two scientists manage to kidnap some people and make it so they can't remember much of anything and put them in a house that turns out to be a maze. There is also a giant rat roaming the maze. The whole point for the scientists is to see if these people can figure out what is going on and find a way out. This was a shorter story than the other two but was still a good length. The final story is called The Billywack. This was a very short story of a couple making out in the woods and being attacked by the monster that is said to stalk the woods.

The effects, I have to admit, are not half bad. There are not a lot to be found though. Most of what we do get is seeing the insides of some people. These are done well but don't really add a lot to the movie. The one effect I did like was the partly eaten legs of one guy who was somehow still alive. I figured he should have blead to death before then but what do I know? The effect was still well done, only the bones showing with some of the leg still left at the bottom. Pretty cool but not worth watching for that effect alone. The acting was pretty bad. You will find the following people through out this movie: Robert Herrera, Rollence Patugan, Vinnie Bilancio, Mary Beth Rim (probably the best of the group), and Beverly Beaton.

I wanted to like this movie even though it did remind me a lot of other movies. The main problem I found that I had was that there was a whole lot of nothing going on to much of the time. Like Vinnie trying to find something to do. I understand that they were trying to show how bored he was getting but all that really did was make a boring story. One can only take so much of watching someone getting bored reading, walking around, trying to get comfortable on the couch and so on. I'm not a big gun person but I think you need to pull the trigger in order for the gun to shoot. I know its all fake but at least put some effort into making me believe. In Lab Rats, it was easy to see that it wasn't shot in sequence. There is blood all over the walls and floor of the maze. The guy that is trying to find his way out gets blood on the back of his shirt as he leaves the room he wakes up in. In the next scene his shirt is clean again. In the next scene there is even more blood, but in a different place, on his shirt. It was just to obvious not to notice. I never thought short stories could get so boring for a horror movie. Tales From The Grave would be a good one for everyone to skip I think. I don't think it would even appeal to the so bad its good crowd.
1 out of 5 Giant rats

Evil Does It

I was hoping to kick June off with a bang but it's not going to happen. The bad movies are still around although they are starting to thin out now. With each movie gone, I am getting closer to the next series I will be watching. Soon after that will be another series. Unless something changes that is but I don't think it will be. Maybe I will throw in another tribute post but will see. I hope everyone is keeping cool out there. Reviews might slow down some since I like to hang out at the pool and work on the tan. I will make sure to work in a movie once in a while though. I do enjoy being able to talk to you all about these and other movies. So now that you know my general plans, what are all of yours? Any vacations I can tag along on?

One place I don't want to go is where ever Evil In The Bayou (2003) was supposed to have been placed at. It starts off in a church. At least the outside is a church. The inside, while there is a cross on one wall, doesn't look much like a church. Almost everyone is sitting in plastic lawn chairs. I don't know, maybe they ran out of money after building the church and didn't have enough to actually furnish it. That could be why the priest said to open their hearts...and their checkbooks. About that time the door open and a very bright white light and wind comes in. Everyone cowers behind their plastic chairs and as the door closes, there are two women sitting in some of the chairs that wasn't there before. The fly, yes fly, to the priest and talk to him while vines wrap around his hands. After some talking they tell him that his soul is now theirs. After saying that, that is when everyone else decides to panic and run out of the church.

From there we meet Jake Le'Claire (Paul Zanone). Jake is a PI who got kicked off the police force for going against the grain so to speak. He is hired by a guy looking who is looking for his wife. She has been missing for a couple of weeks now and it seems the police haven't figured anything out so he is going to try to have Jake find her instead. While out in the middle of now where, never explained why he is out there, he comes across a dead body and calls the police. He meets Det. Dirk Osbourne (Jon Emm) who is getting discouraged by the police force. He will come up with a suggestion and be told to leave it up the people above him and to learn his place. So he ends up teaming up with Jake on the side. They end up investigating a few people who are trying to bring Satan back into the world. Will they be able to stop them or will Satan rule the world?

Evil In The Bayou offers up very, very little for effects. The biggest effect is a guy getting his throat clawed open. This looked fine and all but was a little disappointing that it was basicly the only effect in a horror movie. We do get to see someone's heart after it has been cut out off camera. It didn't take the guy very long at all to cut it out. A lot of the murders are done off screen with the exception of a goat and a chicken. The acting was pretty bad to me. Some people liked Randal Malone because he was so over the top in this movie. At first I did like his performance but the longer the movie went, the more annoyed I was getting by it. I don't know how many times I heard him say, "I will rule the world! We. I meant we will rule the world." Since he is the leader of a cult that is trying to bring Satan back, he has this long, drawn out, evil laugh that he uses in nearly every scene he is in. Satan does come to our reality but before he can rule the world, he must kill two more people at certain dates. Satan is shown as the red Satan that he is often seen in art. He also takes on a more normal form in the hunk Ryan Culver. When it comes time to bring Jake and Dirk into the fold though, Satan becomes Stephanie Beaton. Satan must like being a woman because he is the woman more than the man.

Speaking of Stephanie Beaton, she must like saving money any way she can. Not only does she star in Evil In The Bayou, she also co-wrote it, directed it and is one of the producers. I'm all for women branching out and doing more than just being an actress in films but I don't know if this is a very good start for Stephanie. I guess we have to start somewhere though. One thing that bugged me some about this movie was the time line. It jumps ahead, sometimes months at a time, leaving us to wonder what has been going on durring that time. To make it worse, we pick up on the characters and they act like nothing has changed at all durring all this time. They will note the passing of time by saying a little line about it but that is about it. I didn't really get why Jake was still on the case. He finds the missing woman, she is dead but he does find here. I have to assume that the husband then hired him to find out who killed her because he keeps working the case. I think it is safe to say this is one to skip over. I don't know if the people that enjoy bad movies would get anything out of Evil In The Bayou. All I can say is, good luck with your upcoming projects Stephanie, I sure hope the turn out better.
1 out of 5 It was funny seeing Satan feeling himself up first time he becomes a woman though